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Red Skelton's Recipe For The Perfect Marriage
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Posted by: Hardlyworkin
Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a
little beverage, good food and companionship.
She goes on Tuesdays,
I go on Fridays.
We also sleep in separate beds.
Her's is inCalifornia
and mine is in
Texas.
I take my wife everywhere....
but she keeps finding her
way back.
I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our
anniversary.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!"
she said.
So I suggested the kitchen.
We always hold hands.
If I let go, she shops.
She has an electric blender, electric toaster
and electric bread maker.
She said "There are too many gadgets
and no place to sit down!".
So I bought her an electric chair .
My wife told me the car wasn't
running well because
there was water in the carburetor.
I asked where the car was;
she told me "In the lake"
She got a mud pack and
looked great for two days.
Then the mud fell off.
She ran after the garbage truck,
yelling "Am I too late for the garbage?" .....
The driver said "No, jump in!"
Remember: Marriage is the number
one cause of divorce.
I married Miss Right
I just didn't know her
first name was Always.
I haven't spoken to my
wife in 18 months.
I don't like to interrupt her..
The last fight was my fault though.
My wife asked "What's on the TV?"
I said "Dust!"
Can't you just hear him say all of these?
I love it......... this is the good old days when humor didn't have to start
with a four letter word.......
just clean and
simple fun!!