Since Beauregard was a child in south Louisiana, he wanted to be a paratrooper. So, when he turned 18 he joined the Marines and applied for paratrooper training.
The training was rigorous, but Beauregard was excited about his first jump. Over and over, the drill seargent told his students:
1.) Jump
2.) Wait 3 seconds
3.) Pull the ripcord.
4.) If the chute doesn't open, pull the emergency cord.
5.) The chute will open.
6.) When you get to the ground, there will be a truck to take you back to the base.
Beauregard could not sleep the night before the jump. He kept repeating to himself, jump--wait 3 seconds, pull cord, chute doesn't open, pull emregency cord, chute opens, truck back to base.
Comes the big day and Beauregard was ready. He jumped from the plane. He waited 3 seconds. He pulled the ripcord. The chute didn't open. He pulled the emergency cord. THE CHUTE DIDN'T OPEN !!!
Beauregard said, " Dat lyin' son-of-a-gun seargeant. I bet when I get to de ground, dat truck won't be dere to take me back to de base !!"
Posted by: forwardone
Good `un Terri!
Geoff
Posted by: jojomataketa
Quote:
Originally Posted by betrdanevr
Beauregard said, " Dat lyin' son-of-a-gun seargeant. I bet when I get to de ground, dat truck won't be dere to take me back to de base !!"
"Glory, Glory, what a helluva way to die. He ain`t gonna jump no more, no more."
Interesting site, jojo.
Geoff
Posted by: betrdanevr
Yes, that's very interesting, Jojo! Amazing what's all on the internet. Great song, eh, Geoff? LOL
Posted by: jojomataketa
Yes, a great song!!........I liked the
Zum, Zum, Zum Zum, zum............part!
Posted by: jojomataketa
Pope and the Paratrooper
The Pope dies unexpectedly and finds himself at the gates of Heaven at 0300. He knocks on the gate and a very sleepy eyed angel opens the gate and asks, "wadda you want?" "I'm the recently deceased Pope and have done 63 years of Godly works and thought I should check in here." The Heaven's gate watch checks his clipboard and says, "I ain't got no orders for you here, just bring your stuff and we'll sort this out in the morning" Off they go to an old W.W.I.I. barracks, 3rd floor, open bay. All the bottom racks are taken and all empty lockers have no doors. The Pope stows his gear under a rack and climbs into an upper bunk.
The next morning he awakens to sounds of cheering and clapping. He goes to the window and sees a shiny convertible coming down from the golden headquarters building on the hill. The sidewalks are lined with Angels cheering and throwing confetti. In the back seat of the convertible is a ole Paratrooper, his Jump Wings shining on his chest, a cigar in his mouth, a can of beer in one hand and his other arm around a beautiful blonde Angel.
This upsets the Pope greatly and he runs downstairs to heaven's gates and says, "Hey, explain this to me, here I am, the recently deceased Pope, and I have spent 63 years doing Godly deeds on Earth and am here in open bay barracks, and I see this old Paratrooper that I know has committed every sin known to man, staying in the mansion on the hill and getting a hero's welcome. How can this be?"
St. Peter calmly looks up and says, "We get a Pope up here every 20 or 30 years, but this is the first Paratrooper we've ever had".
Good `un Terri!