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What Women Really Mean
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Posted by: forwardone
What Women Really Mean 
* Yes = No.
* No = Yes.
* Maybe = No.
* I'm sorry = You'll be sorry.
* We need = I want.
* It's your decision = My correct decision should be obvious by now.
* Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.
* We need to talk = I need to complain.
* Sure go ahead = I don't want you to.
* I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron.
* This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.
* I want new curtains = I want new carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper.
* I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.
* Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.
* How much do you love me? = I did something today you're going to hate.
* I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.
* You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.
* Are you listening to me!? = Too late, you're dead. 
Posted by: enrich
Confusing...
Posted by: jojomataketa
A man is driving down a road. A woman is driving down the same road from the opposite direction. As they pass each other, the woman leans out the window and yells "PIG!!" The man immediately leans out his window and yells, B***H !!They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next curve, he crashes into a huge pig in the middle of the road.
MORAL OF THE STORY: If only men would listen.