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10 ways to annoy cops!

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Posted by: Luxor

  1. Say, "Damn, officer, you must have been going fast to keep up with me!"
  2. When he approaches you, stare at his gut and say, "Hmmm. I thought cops had to be physically fit."
  3. Sway and ask if his bulletproof vest protects him from projectile vomiting.
  4. Lie on the ground and ask him to draw your outline in chalk.
  5. Throw his nightstick and tell the police dog to fetch it.
  6. Ask him if you can use his pepper spray to spice up your pizza.
  7. Tell him you wanted to be a cop, but decided to graduate high school instead.
  8. When he asks you to walk the line, "Riverdance" instead.
  9. Instead of pleading the 5th amendment, plead the 13th or 16th.
  10. When he asks for your license, say, "Oh sure, officer, can you hold me beer for a sec?"



Posted by: forwardone

Hmm I think some of those are guaranteed to get the long arm of the law reaching out for you.

Geoff


Posted by: jojomataketa

If none of those have much effect, try this:

'Your momma’s so ugly even the man in the moon turns his head away'


Posted by: jojomataketa

Supermarket Boredom While Your Other Half Is Shopping!

01. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in people’s trolleys when they aren’t looking.

02. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals

03. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies toilet.

04. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone: “Code 3 in Housewares”… and see what happens.

05. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M’s on credit.

06. Move a ‘CAUTION -WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.

07. Set-up a tent in the Camping Department and tell other shoppers you are sleeping over and invite them in if they bring pillows from the Bedding Department.

08. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask: “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?”

09. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your nose.

10. While handling large knives in the Kitchen Dept, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are located.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme from Mission Impossible.

12. Hide in a clothing rack . . . and when people browse through, say: “PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!”

13. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, hit the floor and assume the foetal position and scream “NO! ……..It’s those voices again!!!”

14. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while… then yell loudly: “There’s no toilet paper in here.”


Posted by: forwardone

I must remember some of those next time I`m in a store.


Posted by: Hardlyworkin

They are all really good ones that if used are bound to get you in worse trouble than you would have originally been in lol.



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