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Late-night Jokes!
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Posted by: jojomataketa
Some Late-night political jokes from TV!!
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"Sandra Day O'Connor is retiring from the Supreme Court and now a number of special interest groups are pressuring President Bush on the selection for Supreme Court nominees. Some want Bush to nominate a women, some want a man, some want an African American, some want a Caucasian. You know what that means, who the perfect nomination is? Michael Jackson." --Jay Leno
"Yesterday the city of Paris lost the chance to host the 2012 Olympics. Apparently they're very bitter about it. Apparently the Parisians are disappointed because they were looking forward to being rude to thousands of new people." --Conan O'Brien
" Gov.Schwarzenegger spoke about the dangers of global warming. Schwarzenegger's exact words were: fire, hot, bad." --Conan O'Brien
"Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said the Iranian election was invalid and the winner was no friend to democracy. To which Al Gore said, 'Hey, tell me about it.'" --Jay Leno
"Did you folks see President Bush's speech last night, the special address? ... He said many, many, improvements have been made in Iraq. For example, the roads have been improved, the schools have been improved, medical care has improved. Now if only that could happen here." --David Letterman
"Support for the Iraq war is at an all-time low, and some Republicans blame the media and its '24/7 news coverage of car bombs,' which 'tends to leave a certain impression.' You know, that's so true. You never hear about the cars that DON'T blow up." --Jon Stewart
"President Bush is talking up his economic plan these days. In a speech today, President Bush said his economic plan would help Americans from all walks of life. ... Bush said my plan will help if you're a billionaire or just a millionaire." --Conan O'Brien
"President Bush announced he has decided to visit Vietnam. The president said 'It must be a pretty nice place. I hear John McCain spent five years there.'" --Conan O'Brien
"There is a new book out about Hillary Clinton that claims Bill is still having affairs but Hillary continues to look the other way. The only problem is when Hillary does look the other way Bill's having sex with a women over there too." --Jay Leno
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Posted by: forwardone
Some good ones in that lot.
Geoff